Grit2Greatness Endurance Podcast
The Grit2Greatness Endurance Podcast is your gateway to unlocking the power of resilience, determination, and unshakable grit. Through captivating interviews with endurance athletes, we dive deep into how they conquer challenges and push beyond limits to achieve greatness. Tune in for practical strategies, mindset shifts, and motivational stories that will fuel your own journey of transformation. Whether you’re an athlete or someone striving to break through life’s barriers, this podcast will inspire you to rise above and unleash your true potential. The strength to thrive is already within you—now it's time to ignite it.
Grit2Greatness Endurance Podcast
Triathlons, Transitions, and True Identity with Maddie Valley
Join us on a unique journey as we uncover the vast identities of athletes beyond their sporting achievements with our special guest, Coach Maddie Valley. From a career in federal law enforcement to becoming a relentless triathlete and tireless advocate for transgender athletes, Maddie's story is one of unwavering determination and transformation. As we reminisce about our shared experience at IRONMAN Alaska, we reveal the powerful impact of mutual support and community, which has become a cornerstone in Maddie's life and work. This episode is a testament to breaking barriers and redefining success beyond conventional metrics, all while cherishing the love for sport and the bonds it fosters.
Maddie shares their remarkable journey into triathlons, filled with tales of humility, setbacks, and the sheer grit needed to achieve their endurance dreams. Maddie's candid reflection on overcoming challenges, such as a struggle with swimming and breaking away from toxic influences, highlights the resilience and discipline that have shaped their identity. We explore the values instilled by triathlon training, emphasizing time management and self-improvement, and how these lessons have permeated their personal and professional life. As a coach and advocate, Maddie’s experience underscores the joy of community engagement and the profound impact of inclusive representation in sports.
In our exploration of identity beyond athletic accomplishments, we discuss the importance of embracing all facets of who you are. Maddie’s insights into dealing with imposter syndrome, finding joy after setbacks, and transitioning away from competitive racing offer valuable lessons for any athlete. The conversation touches on stepping back to prioritize other life goals, while staying connected to the sport through alternative avenues like mentoring and volunteering. Whether you’re an athlete or someone seeking inspiration, Maddie’s story encourages us all to find fulfillment in the journey, to value the lessons learned, and to recognize that being an athlete is just one part of a rich and varied identity.
Maddie's Insta: valley_coaching
Maddie's email: mattie.valley@tridot.com
FB - https://www.facebook.com/groups/316745510823638
Insta - https://www.instagram.com/april_spilde/
LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/april-spilde
Welcome to another episode of the Grit2 Greatness Endurance Podcast. Today we're diving deep into a topic that resonates with so many athletes, myself included, and that is the athlete's identity becoming more than just A - B - C. Joining me today is Coach Mattie Valley, an exceptional athlete and coach who knows firsthand the struggles and triumphs of balancing athletic pursuits with life beyond the sport. Together, we're going to explore what it means to be more than our finish times, our medals and our titles. We'll talk about the pressures of tying self-worth to performance, navigating the challenges of stepping away from competition and how to thrive beyond triathlon. If you've ever felt defined by your sport or wondered how to redefine success on your own terms, this episode is for you.
April:At the time of this recording, Mattie is a seven time Ironman finisher and a two time half Ironman finisher. They have over 20 years of experience as a competitive runner nine years experience in triathlon and four years experience coaching athletes and all distances. Mattie is a certified Ironman coach, a TriDot coach, a certified personal trainer and founder of Valley Coaching and Team Valley Triathlon Team. They received the Distinguished Fitness Award from the Federal Law Enforcement Training Center. I can't wait to talk to Mattie more about that.
April:Mattie is an OutFoundation ambassador they are a transgender athlete with the goal of spreading awareness of the issues that prevent people from achieving their fitness goals and I'd even say have a barrier to people entering the sport, and I'm really glad that Coach Mattie is here to talk today. Coach Mattie, welcome to the Grit2 Greatness Endurance Podcast.
Mattie:Thank you for having me. It's such an honor to speak with you today.
April:Mattie, I remember the first time I met you. We were at the swim start of 2022's Ironman Alaska. We were really truly on the precipice of what was going to be an incredibly difficult but also incredibly magnificent day, and I just remember our first conversation being so positive and you were there with my mom next to me. You just chatted me up because you saw that I had that gold swim cap on. We talked about Team Ironman Foundation and I just remember how calm I felt after talking with you in such a chaotic what could have been a chaotic environment, and I just first and foremost want to say thank you for that wonderful, wonderful meet. And then I've just really enjoyed watching your journey since then and seeing how we have both developed in our coaching business, in our lives as a whole, and I'm just so grateful to have you here today.
Mattie:Thanks, yeah, I smile thinking about that morning so much. I've told you every time I open up Trida, I think of you. We were like super cold, super wet. It was a chaotic day because you know, the swim was being shortened. Um, you just talking, you're just like really calmed me down as well, and and and it then allowed me to have one of the best race days I've ever had. And, um, and I, every, every day, I'm thinking about that and thinking about when you're you're posting things and the Tridot um Facebook group, when you're posting things in the Tridot Facebook group, when you're posting things on your own page, just how I'm so impressed and proud to see just how much you're doing and just out there, and just you've created this brand and this team and just you're excelling and I just it warms my heart.
April:Every time.
Mattie:I open up Facebook. I'm just like. There goes April again. I'm so proud of you.
April:Oh, Mattie, thank you. It's really nice to hear that, especially from someone who doesn't have to say that. I really appreciate that and it's kind of I'm a solo entrepreneur, right, and it can be a little bit lonesome out there, so hearing that from a trusted coach and friend, that means a lot. I want to talk a little bit with you. I'm going to go off script because I read in your bio about the Distinguished Fitness Award. Did you serve in a law enforcement capacity? Can you tell me a little bit about that?
Mattie:Yeah, so I started out my career as a volunteer because everybody said that's the best way to work in the federal government is start out as a volunteer. And so I did three years up in Alaska as an AmeriCorps volunteer, living in a tent, living off of food stamps. Because you don't make any money as an AmeriCorps volunteer and we work for the National Park Service, the Forest Service, fish and Wildlife Department of Transportation and in return they give you an education award to go back to school or go to school similar to kind of like the Peace Corps, except you're here in the United States, and so I use my education award to go to seasonal law enforcement academy for the National Park Service. The way the National Park Service works it's a little bit different than all other federal law enforcement agencies where you go to it, you pay out of pocket to go to a seasonal academy, then you work up to six years as a seasonal and then you get your permanent status and you go to the Federal Law Enforcement Training Center in Brunswick, georgia, and then when you're there you're meshed with everybody else Forest Service, blm, postal Service is there, dhs, so all federal law enforcement is there. Vhs, you know. So all federal law enforcement is there, except for FBI and CIA. They go to, they go to their own special place.
Mattie:But and so I worked for the National Park Service up until 2020. I, I just did not want to do law enforcement anymore, did not want to do law enforcement anymore. 2020 was a difficult year for everybody, but I was. I was seeing things that I I was. I didn't want to make mistakes in law enforcement. I found this passion that I love triathlon, I loved competing. I had a person in my life that was important to me. I did not want to do something on the job that was going to jeopardize all of that, that I would lose all of that.
Mattie:And so I resigned and I got my coaching certificate and switched gears from telling people, no, they can't do something to telling people, yes, you can, let's figure out how to do it kind of thing. They can't do something to telling people, yes, you can, let's figure out how to do it kind of thing. Now I can grow out my hair because I don't have to cut it for law enforcement. So it was a win-win situation.
April:I can relate so hard to that. I don't know if you know this, but I served in a law enforcement capacity in my Air Force career within a career field called security forces my air force career, um, within a career field called security forces, and the the the thing that you brought up about saying no and telling people you can't do that, or correcting, correcting, correcting or kind of meeting someone maybe on one of their worst days or when they're at their worst self and then having to be the authoritarian. That was what I struggled with also, and we are very similar in that positivity and that wanting to encourage and bring people up, and I can definitely see how that would have strained you. But I appreciate your service. I want to tell you that, and, especially as a volunteer and as someone who did it from a service mindset, I think that's incredible, yeah thank you, you too.
Mattie:I just actually I did not know that about you until I decided to do my homework and start listening, and I heard that in episode one or two, and so I made a note to myself that I'm like I'm, there's another win for April, right there.
April:Yeah, it was a winning experience in so many ways that I got to make an impact on the people that I served with and that that I do look back on fondly, and I do think I grew a lot from that experience. I'm sure you can relate.
Mattie:Right, right, yeah, for sure it's definitely changed my mindset too. I you know, living in Alaska, everybody's so friendly, I would hitchhike all the time, and now I'm so afraid to get in any stranger's car. What part of Alaska were you in? Based out of Juneau? And so that's why Ironman Alaska was so important to me. It was going home, and so we lived in our tents out at Eagle State Park, which was a few miles from the turnaround point on the bike, and so I knew that road like the back of my hand and the trail that we ran on. For the marathon through that wooded portion I had done I can't even tell you how many hours of trail work, cleaning up down trees, doing repair on hillsides and stuff. So it was definitely going home to me and it was a very important race for me.
April:Yeah, that just makes that even more special. I didn't know that you were from Juneau and you were literally. It was a homecoming. It felt like a homecoming for me too, because I had been stationed in Alaska for my first duty station for five years and I've claimed my residency since then. So coming back to Alaska, being stationed at Allison again, and then Peter and I going out to Juneau for that one and done, Ironman. Alaska experience was very special.
Mattie:Yeah, yeah, it was. People always ask me what my favorite race was and it's hard to say, but that one was really incredible. I had a really great day. The community was just so welcoming and I had a good performance. Up until that point. You know my best performance and then I obviously have progressed since then. But yeah, it was special. I really enjoyed sharing the course with you and I look back fondly at it almost on a daily basis. You have no idea how often you come in my mind that morning. Oh.
April:Mattie wow, oh my heart, okay, this is a true love fest. So our audience we apologize, but not really. But I definitely want to highlight Mattie today, and so we're going to start jumping into these questions. I want to start with you. What brought you because you did kind of allude to it when you talked about leaving law enforcement to be a triathlon coach, but what brought you to the sport of triathlon?
Mattie:I was always competitive runner. Middle school started in middle school as a sprinter track and everything cross-country. Then, obviously, once you graduate high school unless you're going to college it's just the 5Ks. I was performing really well at that distance but I had just become bored with running. It had become stale to me.
Mattie:I was in a really toxic relationship at the time that I needed to take a break from, and so I came across the Anything Is Possible video on YouTube that Iron man had produced and I did not know what I was watching. They were swimming in Kailua Bay and then biking and running through this lava field and it sounded so amazing and crazy all at the same time and I was like I want to do that. I don't know what that is, but I want to do that. And so I would tell people all the time. I was like I want to be an Ironman. And they're like, oh, you're into triathlon. And I was like I don't know what that is, I want to be an Ironman. And so I I signed up for Oceanside 70.3.
Mattie:Because, again, I didn't know, like, the difference between anything and I didn't put any work into it, no preparation whatsoever, because I was like I'm a competitive runner. I'm a backcountry ranger. I hike 50 miles a week. You know I can do this. I biked my bike once for 50 miles. I grew up splashing around in a pool. How hard could this be Right? And it was hard, so I failed miserably. I they. The gun went off. This was back when they still did like mass start. Um and so the gun went off and I promptly just swam right over to the lifeguards and said please, I don't want to do this.
Mattie:And so I um, I got home. As soon as I got home, I signed back up for Oceanside 70.3 in 2017. And I said you know what? I didn't complete it, so let's do this thing. And so I got some swim lessons. I ran a little bit more, I biked a little bit more and I only swam in the pool four times with a swim coach at the YMCA. But I should be good now, right, and I was not good. I still could not complete the swim and so, still not ready to give up, my sister said I want to do this with you, so let's do 70.3, Old Orchard Beach. By this point I'm figuring out there's a difference between 70.3. And so I I put in a little bit more work and everything and just keep adding on there and I get to Old Orchard Beach in Maine and I again just cannot complete the swim. So not totally defeated yet.
Mattie:Fourth time's a charm. I signed up for 70.3, Arizona for 2018. And it wasn't until like three or four weeks later, when I was looking at my bank account and I was like why does that raise $800? But all the other ones were 400. That doesn't make any sense. It turned out that I had signed up for the full distance. So I decided it was time to like officially just end this super toxic relationship where there's drinking a couple 12 packs a week, there's like she's smoking tons of pots and and smoking cigarettes and like it was just a very dirty environment to try to be a clean athlete in and um I I left her and got an actual coach, put in some real work, and a year later almost to the month of breaking up with her and actually deciding that this was a real thing that I wanted to pursue, I was able to complete my very first triathlon, which was Ironman Arizona, and skipped all the distances.
Mattie:Oh, you're amazing so I uh, yeah, that's, that's. Uh, you know, you just keep, keep working at it and put in the hard work and and uh, eventually it'll pay off wow, I I have not heard a story like that before, just.
April:I mean you steadily yeah chipped away at what you needed to, to figure out, but to to go from.
Mattie:Uh what four 70.3s yep uh three three, and then the fourth was uh iron man arizona.
April:Yeah, that's a heck of a journey.
Mattie:Yes, yes, thanks. So finally, after like three years of competing, I finally went back and and completed Oceanside 70.3, to just pick that box.
April:Incredible Way to stick to it too. That's like the definition of determination, right there.
Mattie:That's stick-to-itiveness, yes, yeah. Of determination right there.
April:That's intuitiveness, yes, yeah so, Mattie, can you tell me a little bit about how triathlon being a triathlete has shaped your identity, beyond just those finish lines and accomplishments?
Mattie:uh, greg flitt, I believe, is how his last name was pronounced. Um, he was uh, army ranger, motivational speaker, fitness fitness model. He passed away in like the late 90s. I believe he was doing some kind of exercise routine on some train tracks or something. And he talks about if you're going to do something, do it right, to the best of your ability. If you're going to dust the countertops, you pick up the picture frame and dust under it, you're not going to dust around it.
Mattie:So I listened to that almost daily before while I was training for Ironman Arizona, and so that by itself has changed who I am. Is that now, even the smallest thing is that if I'm vacuuming, I pick up everything off the floor and I vacuum all the way around because I'm going to do the job right and I'm going to do it to the best of my ability. And, uh, that is one takeaway of of this triathlon journey is is do it to the best of your ability. And the other thing was was that I was called a quitter, that that girlfriend that I talked about, she called me a quitter all the time, and if somebody calls you, if somebody calls you anything, you're going to start to believe it. You know over and over and over again and so I was. I was believing it that I'm I'm a quitter, but that wasn't the case because I was still signing up for these races and completing it, and so the triathlon journey really helped solidify that. I am determined, I am committed, I'm not a quitter, and it's helped mold me in that way that I know that if I say I'm going to do something, I'm going to do it. There's no ifs, ands or buts about it.
Mattie:And then just time management and organization. You've got to be super organized. It's all about time management with completing triathlon and stuff or any sports in general. When I worked for the park service, I lived an hour away from the pool, and so I would get up at 3.30 in the morning and go drive to the pool, go swim for a couple hours, hit the Burger King drive-thru on the way home, shower, get ready for work, eat all day, so that way I could use my lunch break to take a nap and then do a workout in the evening and then not get to bed till 10 o'clock at night. And so, looking at your day and realizing that there's only 24 hours and, depending on how successful you want to be. You've got to look at those 24 hours and realize what you can do and optimize that time as much as possible.
April:Yeah, there's a lot that you shared there that I could do a whole podcast on. One thing that really struck a chord was how you learned, especially through training for Ironman Arizona, the ability to do it to the max and that's actually one of my core values is wholeheartedness. Something that I love about your story is how you took an aspirational value to me and in my mind that's what I think is. You took something that you weren't living in the past, you weren't giving all yourself, you were kind of just learning as you go. But you took that and you you changed it and applied it to a goal that you had had um, you wanted to be an Ironman. That is incredibly powerful. How transformational just having that value, you living it purposefully.
April:And then also your ability to walk away from a toxic relationship in the midst of something that is extremely stressful Training for Ironman is not easy and having the gumption and the guts to walk away from something that you probably were in a comfortable environment in that regard that you knew what to expect, right. So having a long-term relationship, that's toxic. People tend to stay there for some reason or another, and I just am very amazed and impressed that you had two fundamental shifts. You walked away from a bad relationship and you walked into a transformational moment in your life that set you off on this. This amazing course that has I just I'm blown away by that yeah, thanks.
Mattie:I um, it was coming out of my shell and finding out who I really was, for sure.
April:Mattie, can you tell me a little bit about what it's like, um being a part of a team or a community, and how that has impacted your performance as a triathlete, as an athlete as a whole?
Mattie:After completing Ironman Arizona in 2018, I had completed the race for me. So now I was kind of more interested in completing a race for the community that I raced in or for somebody else race for the community that I raced in or for somebody else and so after I finished the race, I signed up with the Ironman Foundation and I raced with them in Santa Rosa and then all the way up until 2022. You know, being able to race with the team around you, friends to be there and support you that are all kind of working towards that same common goal, was so inspiring. And the Ironman Foundation holds the most incredible people. I still have some of the most amazing friends that are all doing such incredible things that I've met through there, and so I love all of those people and I loved the aspect of giving back to our communities that we're raising. And I spoke about volunteer work earlier. Volunteer work is super important to me and I loved that about the Ironman Foundation. We did for Santa Rosa. We cleaned up after the Santa Rosa wildfires back in 2018-19. So our service project in 2019 was to clean up the neighborhoods that that had affected and presented them with a check, and so it felt like, while we're racing, where the whole city was there for us, kind of thing even though I'm sure you know they're there for their own people but that's what it felt like because we had provided that service for them. And when, in 2020, we raised money for COVID relief to pay for the nurses' lunches, to create PPE, to give it to people that were out of work, the money went to them and that was just such a powerful thing to keep me training, keep me motivated, kept me coming back for more. Was that return to the people that were there supporting all of us.
Mattie:After I left the Ironman Foundation, I was coaching, and so it had shifted to a different type of motivation, different type of team, and and now it was inspiring, um, or being inspired by my own athletes and watching them. I coach a lot of athletes that this is their first time that they've had the dream to be an Ironman for ever since they were a kid, which I was like. I just saw a video on TV once Um, but they, uh, but they all want to be an Ironman since they were a kid, and so to work with them and see them go through that journey, for when they meet those milestones of their first half marathon or the first time they bike 56 miles and just seeing their faces when they cross those finish lines, it's, it's super inspiring for me. It keeps me going, keeps me motivated and excited about the sport is is how much, uh, enjoy that they're getting out of it and, um, in 2022, 2021, to 2021, somewhere in there, I came out and out and proud now, and so now it's kind of more shifting, new motivation and inspiration coming from a whole new community of people.
Mattie:And you know, running in Alaska. I started this in Alaska as I run the marathon or the half marathon, I pick them up at my special needs bag the two transgender flags one for myself and one for the person that's afraid to come out and I call them my power ups, and so carrying them for somebody else is it's again super inspiring to be part of such a welcoming community, and in Alaska I had such great positive feedback from the crowds that then I was able to carry that with me. At Lake Placid I had several people come up to me and thank me for carrying the flags because they knew somebody or their family member was transgender or or that they had just had a surgery, and so it was just, it's just powerful to be involved in in a community and not not racing just for yourself to complete that goal, but to complete that goal for somebody else.
April:Yeah, I was getting teary eyed listening to that, just thinking about how that, how much that representation, matters. And it's interesting to think about how you came to Ironman because of a commercial that you saw on. Anything is possible and then how this again a beautiful transformation from focusing on you to how can I give back and how can I be a beacon for, for those who are afraid to come out, and I just think that's a beautiful way to bring people in. And I brought that up earlier in in the intro to how I'm sure there's. There's a lot of barriers to trans athletes. That keeps people from really joining something that is life affirming and life rewarding. How devastating that is for someone if they're not able to access that because of a fear, a legitimate fear because they might not be accepted.
Mattie:Yeah, yeah for sure. I did not have any role models growing up and even now it's tough to have a role model, and so that's kind of my goal is to be that positive role model. There's such a negative stigma in the media about transgender athletes and so just being that good role model and being a good beacon for people. It is super scary. At Ironman Alaska I was so afraid that was my first time being out at a race. I changed in the port-a-potty before the change tents because I was so worried about having to go through those change tents, and so there is still some barriers in in in the in just race day.
Mattie:But uh, what I love about iron man and triathlon is that all, all shapes and sizes are accepted and um, it's, it's still such a powerful thing that um and and a hard thing that that that's really the. Regardless of how you look or act or feel or whatever you can, the main goal is just to swim 2.4 miles, bike 112 and then run a marathon and under 17 hours, and it doesn't matter what you look like or what. I really enjoyed that versus some of these other things, because it's it's. It is a very welcoming sport. But, um, there are still a lot of hurdles and and uh, especially in training. I mean at the pool, every day I get afraid of of getting in the water, afraid of being seen. So, um, different conversation for a different time.
April:No, thank you for that. Thank you for sharing that I. I think there's, I'm sure, a lot of people that can relate to how uncomfortable that is, and I I didn't know that was your first um Ironman coming out and I to be there with you in that way is just even more meaningful.
Mattie:It was a special race for more reasons than one.
April:Well, Mattie, what brought you to TriDot?
Mattie:I was up at Lake Placid this a couple months ago and I love the shift that Iron man has shifted with their iron man university. Um, the partnership with tridot um, I had been seeing you post about tridot stuff for months and I was like I don't know.
Mattie:I don't know if I necessarily believe this or I'm on board with all of this. My way is working. This has got to be the right way, right. But I was up at Lake Placid and they had asked coaches if they were interested in working the Ironman U-Tent or the TriDot tent and I was like I'll do that. I have huge imposter syndrome but I will do that. How bad could it be Right? And um, I, uh, I volunteered for the Ironman U-10s and we're set up next to Tridot, and so they were.
Mattie:I was hearing about it all day and I was like getting more and more curious as the day went on and, uh, finally at the end of the day I was like, okay, you guys got to hook me up with this. April talks about it all the time. Got to hook me up with this. April talks about it all the time. I'm hearing about the value that you guys are talking about off to the side, to these athletes. I'm very, very curious. And so I did my introductory phone call with them and in like five minutes I was sold.
Mattie:I coach athletes all over the country and when you're using training peaks, you're creating the workouts for the optimal conditions.
Mattie:And unless they're going to text or call you five minutes before their workout when they decide, oh, I'm going to do this workout at 930 at night as opposed to 5am, they're going to be over training due to environmental conditions. And unless I go in five minutes beforehand and adjust their entire training workout, they're going to then be over the limit. And when I was told about the environmental factors that Trida offers, I was like this is a game changer. This is a game changer because there is such a difference between training at 5 am, when you're fresh, than even just at 10 am, when there is just a little bit less humidity, or more humidity depending on where you're located, and that'll change your projected pace of 10 minutes 10 to 10 minutes 40. And so now you're not, you're just slowed down just a little bit to deal with those environmental factors and I was like this is a no brainer. Why am I? I should have been on board with this a long time ago. I apologize.
April:I promise this, this podcast is not being paid by Tridot. These are. We just really love it that much and I, I'm I'm grateful that, um coach Mattie, that you have made that, um, that switch Cause I do think there's so much value, just like you talked about with the environment norm and um being at altitude here in Colorado Springs. Um, tridot takes into consideration the fact that there's more exertion because there's less oxygen, and I love that. It tweaks the program every workout to accommodate for altitude, for environment, for your genetics.
April:It's insane how much it can get that detailed. And, yeah, that's so cool, and you're using it to coach too, which I just think that detailed and yeah, that's so cool, and you're you're using it to coach too, which it is. I just think that's fantastic.
Mattie:Yeah, yeah.
April:We kind of touched on it a little bit here with just your journey as a triathlete as well as being a transgender athlete, and and what that entails for all the different obstacles and things that you have experienced. But I want to ask you have you ever struggled with feeling like your value or self-worth was tied solely to your performance as an athlete and, and if so, how did you navigate that?
Mattie:100 when I started coaching. Um, that's kind of when I realized that my performances were tied to my identity and self-worth and I would start crying behind my sunglasses if I would have to walk because I was really struggling with all of that. But I think it was a lot of fear of of disappointing my, my athletes. It was a lot of that fear of I'm not going to be able to get athletes If I don't have good results. It's going to be a fear of I'm not going to get athletes If I don't have um many races under my belt. I mean, I look at some of these people and they're like, oh, I've done 200 Ironmans or whatever, and I was so. So my self-worth was being tied directly to that and I blame a lot of that on on. The coaching aspect of things was that I could not separate that. But I would get really depressed, really lose that joy for racing. It was kind of just I'm ticking a box now to try to get to Kona. I have to do 12 races. There's no way I can ever be fast enough to qualify for Kona. I've got to do the 12 race legacy program. I'm just ticking boxes. At this point I'm not enjoying this anymore.
Mattie:And then when I got to Texas earlier this year, I had put a lot of work into this and I felt like this was my last opportunity to qualify for Kona before moving into the next age group and it getting significantly harder. That's uh. I I had a miserable swim. I hated every second of it and I hated every second of the bike and I walked the marathon and I was just in tears the whole time and I was like I absolutely hate this. I'm not enjoying this at all, but I'm only doing this to get that Kona spot, to say that I'm a six time Ironman finisher, so I can get more clients and everything. And it was a terrible way to go about racing and it was a terrible thing to hold over yourself expectations and stuff.
Mattie:So, going into Lake Placid in July, I was not really looking forward to it. I was super nervous about it. I had been injured there in 2021. I had a bike wreck like three weeks before the race and I decided I'll be fine, I'll race this race. I was not okay and uh, so I was a DNF there my very first DNF at the Ironman distance and, um, I tried to go back in 2023, got COVID. Uh, like 30 minutes before it was time to rack my bike I tested positive so I was really not looking forward to racing in Lake Placid because I had been injured there. I was worried about getting COVID again. I was really scared about, like, my performance. I did not want to walk that marathon. I was not looking forward to this and to piggyback. All of that was that I had volunteered to work this Ironman U-Tent and I had such imposter syndrome about the whole thing because I was like, what do I know? I've only been involved in this sport for nine years. I've only been coaching for four years. What do I know? Like certainly there's. I am not ready for this. I should really not be in Lake Placid. I was not in a good mental headspace for this and my, I feel like I'm all over the place with this story.
Mattie:My dad had passed away in February and he Lake Placid was very special to him February, and he Lake Placid was very special to him. He worked for the newspaper in New York whenever that was, 1980, 1982, whenever the Olympics were there, and so he was a photographer for the sports section. It was there out there documenting everything, and so it was a very important place for him and he wanted to go with us in 2021. We told him he couldn't because he was not well. He wanted to go with me in 2023. He couldn't go with me because he was not well. And so now he was gone and there was no opportunity for him to go back.
Mattie:And after Ironman Santa Rosa in 2019, I bought him a support crew medal and when I cleaned out his room earlier this year, that support crew medal was on his nightstand. And so, after all of these years, five years of sitting there and so I took it up to Lake Placid with me and so, having that medal with me, I had so many, so many people had to call me and talk me off this ledge and and remind me that it was a privilege to be there. It was a privilege to be racing. Mike Riley was coming out of retirement. This is the 25th anniversary. So many people wanted to be there. Woody from the Ironman Foundation was supposed to race it with me. He got injured, so he shipped me off as race wheels and so I was carrying my dad and Woody with me.
Mattie:And so, with all of these pep talks, a lot of these reminders that it was a privilege working at the Ironman Village, at the Ironman U-Tent and answering these first timers questions and being one of the speakers at the first timers briefing. I realized that this was their first race. They had nothing. I mean they were, they didn't know what they were doing. I mean they knew what they were doing but I have done seven of these like I, or seven starts Like I know what I'm doing. This is just swim bike and run. It's swim bike and run with 2,500 of your best friends. And you've done this. You know you're capable of doing this. There's nothing wrong. You've trained. Just relax and enjoy this.
Mattie:And having all of those pep talks, having that kind of removal of that imposter syndrome, reminding myself that I'm doing this with my dad and with Woody, I was finally able to enjoy this and enjoy this moment, and so I had a phenomenal swim On the bike. I had written out all of these pep talks on my gels from people that had had sent me messages, so every 30 minutes I was reading a motivational speech on the bike and so I never once wasn't having a good time and I was smiling the entire time and it was. I was just. I remembered how fun this was, and I did not have a great bike by any means, but I didn't stop smiling the entire time and on the run, I did end up having to walk due to that injury flaring up from 2021.
Mattie:But instead of walking and crying behind my sunglasses, I was walking and enjoying every conversation with every person. I was saying to my dad yeah, do you remember this hotel? I bet you took pictures from this spot at the horse grounds. Or I bet you remember looking at the ski jumps from this spot or this angle. I could totally see you taking a picture from this spot.
Mattie:And so I had just so much fun and I remember that it doesn't matter if you finish first or last. You get that same finisher medal. If you have to walk, walking is winning and you're still. That's in the rules. You know. You can run, walk or crawl to get to the finish line. It doesn't matter. Do you remember the finish times for all of your races? No, it's those, those little moments that you enjoyed, on course, with people running up to you and telling you thank you for carrying the transgender flag. So, um, it was uh, it was a way different experience from from uh, lake Placid to just what three or four months before in Texas, where I was ready to retire, I was like I can't do this anymore. I'm I. I can't compete at the level that I was at. This is just not working. I can't do it, I'm done. And to now walk away and be like I think I might be ready for another race.
April:I think this is a really great representation of how you reframed your whole mentality around one you as a an exceptional coach and as someone who is very worthy of being able to help and and represent um people not only their first time coming to triathlon, but also their journey first time coming to triathlon, but also their journey.
April:So I hate imposter syndrome I know what that's like, but I it's so refreshing to hear of a story where you turn that down and you turned up the volume on. You are an incredible coach and someone who can give back in such a positive way. And then I really think that was powerful how you had turned around your thoughts of I got to do this race or I don't want to do this because of the A, b or C, and instead you felt privileged, you felt even humbled to be there because of who you have with you and who you are honoring. I love that Mike Riley was there. I mean, I feel like that is the universe coming together in such a powerful way and look how many people now you are going to positively impact because of that story. Thank you.
Mattie:It was. It was definitely something I needed to bring me back out of this funk. For sure, for sure.
April:And how cool that you got to be the voice for first timers like, hey, this is a swim, bike run, that's all it is Get out of your head.
Mattie:Get out of your head, coach. Yeah, when they introduced me uh, when Casey introduced all of us coaches on the panel to talk to them, she said don't be nervous, don't be shy, they're here to help you, kind of thing. And as soon as she finished saying that, I turned to my little pod of athletes and I was like she was actually talking about me, not you guys.
April:Little pep talk for you. So, mattie, we have talked a lot about different obstacles. We've talked about decoupling the thought that your performance is tied to your self-worth, but I want to talk now about a time where you've had to step away from competing or training for a period of time. How did that affect you and how were you able to move through that?
Mattie:I got injured in 2021 at Lake Placid and, instead of just stepping away, and I was so focused on trying to get to that next race, being healthy and ready to go, and so I really struggled with that at that time. Now, currently, where I am in life I'm at the point where I'm getting older there are things that I want to be spending more, spending money on, uh other than this, or um, things that I want to be doing other than this, that I I need to take some time away from uh triathlon, um, whether it's uh surgeries or just as simple as getting my ears pierced. You know you can't go swimming after getting your ears pierced, apparently. So I, after Lake Placid actually before I even went up to Lake Placid I was again, like I said, I was thinking about I need to take some time off because I I there are other things that are becoming more important to me, and so, um, that I need to get done, and so I didn't sign up for a next race after Lake Placid and, uh, I got my ears pierced a couple of days after first time. I was super excited about that and, um, I was out of the pool for for like six weeks, and that was. That was tough, and what I tell my athletes, or even what I needed to right now, is and again this kind of shift happened, uh, lake Placid, when I was kind of reawakened is that, um, a lot of us came to triathlon due to cross training, uh, or injury, and we were picking up a cross training thing.
Mattie:But the thing is, is that, um, if you, if you are going to step away from this, you don't need to totally 100% retire from everything? Is that? Maybe it's just being a member of a relay team if you want to stick with triathlon? Maybe it's picking up some other anaerobic workout or aerobic workout like bike packing or gravel racing or cross-country skiing. You know, there's many ways that you can continue doing that, picking up strength training.
Mattie:But if you enjoyed the coach aspect, maybe it's going down and getting a personal trainer at the gym and really focusing on some of those things that maybe caused that injury in the first place or caused you to now retire. If it's just the enjoy of the community and the love of the sport, maybe it's volunteering at the races or mentoring somebody. Working at a run shop, too, was great, because I had all these people coming in just starting out like what kind of shoes do I need? Well, tell me about nutrition, kind of thing. That's a great way to still be involved in the sport is just doing that.
Mattie:Be a mentor or just share your knowledge, coach. That way you're not 100% stepping away and, like I said, that mindset shifted to. It's something we said a lot in law enforcement is what's important now right? And if what's important right now is maybe these other goals, these other obligations, maybe these other time constraints that are now affecting things, or maybe it's an injury, is that let's look at what's important right now, and so that's something that I would recommend for people.
April:I think there are so many good tips that you shared, and one of them that stuck out to me is something that I I had to lean into because I was feeling extremely burned out on road triathlon and kind of also dealing with balancing and counterbalancing my military life, my home life and then being an athlete and what that actually meant. And also, oh, I just did this Ironman and being asked when am I going to do another one? And I'm like I don't know to do another one, and I'm like I don't know, I'm still coming down from this and, um, I think for me giving myself permission to be curious about other things and explore a little bit about what I wanted to do versus another checkbox, right, um, I think that was so helpful for me to stay in this game and it opened up a whole new uh arena for me because I got interested in mountain biking.
April:And now I'm just like I want to ride every trail. I want to do every, every off-road triathlon. And now I'm looking at okay, what are some enduro races I can do? Or long cost cross country, and now that we're in Colorado it's like the hub for all mountain biking. I'm like this is I'm so happy that I didn't keep myself or limit myself, because I thought I had to do this type or this um, all three at all times, and I just I'm grateful that, because we are able to give ourselves that permission not tie ourselves down.
April:Look at all these great things that have happened and I love your uh sharing of one. How cool that you got your ears pierced. I love that. I, I've, I've been, I've got a whole list of tattoos that I've wanted to get since I became a triathlete and I'm like man wanted to get, since I became a triathlete and I'm like man, that means I got to be out of the pool for weeks, months, Um, so that's definitely a thing, Um, but I'm glad you did that.
April:And, um, what you said about going in and working in the shoe store and being able to share tips and stuff like that and just all the different things you can plug in. Volunteering 100% will keep you plugged in and it's okay to give yourself permission to walk away from one, two or all three of those. Sports activity is activity and we want to encourage you to find what is it that's going to keep you in the game and keep you excited about being healthy.
April:Yeah for sure, Mattie, what would you, what advice would you give to athletes who are struggling with the fear of losing their athlete identity, either when they retire or they are sidelined by an injury?
Mattie:Yeah, it's just, it's like we just said, is that it's just okay to walk away and there are many other opportunities out there. And Woody and I had that conversation a lot when he got injured. Because he's in his 60s, he's been to every single Ironman Lake Placid, except for this year and maybe last year and obviously in 2020. And so we had this conversation a lot. It's like he's like I, I don't know what I'm gonna do, like I, I don't. I I feel kind of lost now and um, now, it's, it's just, he goes out and goes and bikes whenever he wants.
Mattie:There's no schedule for that and none of us really enjoy swimming, except for you, and so you know you don't even have to do the swimming part anymore. So you know, just again, ask yourself what did I enjoy about this sport and and how can I, how can I keep doing that in some form or function? You know if it's just riding your bike to go get coffee and or, you know, joining a group club or group ride or something, or group run on Sundays. Now, to find that rejoy of running is that I've joined a queer running group and we just run a mile around Forsyth Park every Sunday. That's it. It's one lap around the park and just to its low intensity, you get to kind of interact with people that are training for stuff and just kind of, where are you losing that joy or what are those aspects that you want to hold on to whether or not you're retiring or you're injured?
Mattie:Is that find something that then will kind of I don't want to say replace that? That's just sounds like something an addict would do. Is that find something that will supplement that and help you? Help you with that?
April:So we we've talked a lot and I so appreciate your willingness to really crack open what's going on behind the scenes of who you are and why you're here and just being such an awesome coach. I want to ask you, as we're coming to a close, one of the questions I like to ask my guests, because things answers are typically always different. But Mattie, how would you define greatness?
Mattie:me during, like the interview week of of of, uh, like how to get a job, kind of interview week, not like, uh, interviewing suspects or, or, or, um, um victims is that uh, for the police departments. They ask what are you doing for your community? And I love that and that has stuck with me ever since, and so greatness to me is is is moving past your own personal wants or goals and and achieving things for your community. Building people up, making sure that other people are successful when other people are successful.
April:that's greatness and that is success, and so that's what greatness means to me working with law enforcement, working for forestry service, being a coach and just all these different ways that you have given back. I think that is at the heart of you and I'm glad we shared that today and uncovered that. So wholeheartedness and service are just very front and center.
April:Thank you it just speaks to your greatness. I wouldn't go that far. No, I love. I think that's such a great definition. Thank you, coach Mattie. Thank you for being here on the Grit2 Greatness podcast.
Mattie:For having me. It was so wonderful talking to you, April.
April:Thank you so much for joining us today and a huge thank you to Coach Mattie Valley for sharing such valuable insights into the complex relationship between the athletic identity and the rest of our lives. It's easy to get wrapped up in the titles and achievements but, as we heard today, true growth comes from embracing all parts of who we are, both in and out of the sport. If you want to reach out to Coach Mattie, you can find them at valley_ coaching on Instagram or email them at mattie. v Valley@tridot. com. Remember, being an athlete is just one part of your identity. Whether you're competing at the highest level or taking a step back, the lessons you learn in the process are what truly shape you. If this conversation struck a chord, please share it with someone who might need to hear it, and don't forget to join us next time as we continue exploring the power of endurance and resilience. Until then, keep pushing, keep growing and continue to create your great Thank you, thank you.